And They Are Off!!!
Ξ April 11th, 2008 | → 21 Comments | ∇ alcohol |
We made it in one piece to Kentucky!!! Instead of leaving at 6 PM (when I was actually ready, thank you very much), we didn’t leave Pittsburgh until 7:20. After a long day at work. For a drive that was scheduled to take 6 1/2 hours. And I was driving (ok, my choice).
As an admitted leadfoot, I am happy to announce that I shaved some time from the Yahoo maps announced 6 1/2 hour journey. We pulled up in front of the hotel at 12:54 AM. Yay, me! And yay police for not being anywhere near me!!! Plus yay us for not getting lost! Life is so very good.
Speaking of good, thanks for the opinions on yesterday’s post. Yinz guys rock. Hard.
I need to get some rest. Tomorrow Today the Maker’s Mark Mile horse race at Keeneland starts at 1 PM and we need to go to the Liquor Barn to stock up on awesome hootch that we can’t get in PA.
Before I go I will leave you with a few photos of us about to embark on our adventure. I’m not sure Maker’s Mark and the other Ambassadors are ready for our level of “class.” More photos to follow as often as possible.
Anyone heard the one about the midget with a hairlip who desired to purchase a horse? He wanted to see her eyes. He wanted to see her teeth. He wanted to see her twat. Never mind. My aunt is laughing so hard she is snorting and I can’t quite make out the rest of the joke. Perhaps I will return with the rest of it. And the punchline. Then again, maybe it will be the same as Judd Nelson’s character in The Breakfast Club when he is crawling above the ceiling, out of the closet, and is telling the joke about the naked lady with a poodle under her arm who walks into a bar. I never did figure out the punchline to that one either…
on April 11th, 2008 at 2:30 AM
twat was misheard… should have been trot… the punch line is “I’m sowwy… could you have the horse wun awond fo me”… Lemme know if you need more than that… :P
on April 11th, 2008 at 7:19 AM
Well sugar you’ll be easy for me to find ;-)
on April 11th, 2008 at 8:07 AM
Boy oh boy, no good can come of this…
on April 11th, 2008 at 8:14 AM
Hee hee
on April 11th, 2008 at 9:25 AM
Ah, a twat joke in the morning. Perfecto! I’m envious that you’re going to the races and meeting Turnbaby. I’m envious of the hat too. Have a simply spectacular time!
on April 11th, 2008 at 9:49 AM
tori – hee! she sorta finally got the joke out. asthma attack to do it, but we kinda heard it. fun.
TUUUUUUUUUUUURN! – we won’t be wearing the horse hats, sorry. they certainly entertained us for the 6 + hours we were on the road, though.
fabby – define good…
win – i’ll have plenty of mint julips for ya!
on April 11th, 2008 at 10:13 AM
I’ve determined a way to have some fun this weekend in five easy steps:
(1) Pick up a guy at the bar. Make sure he’s an Italian, semi-mafioso type.
(2) Go back to his place for a wild night of steaminess.
(3) While he’s asleep — take your horsey hat and put it on the pillow next to him with a note pinned on it saying “You’re next — The Family.”
(4) Hide in the closet and film him waking up.
(5) Post on YouTube for us!
Enjoy…
on April 11th, 2008 at 11:51 AM
LOL @ Shiny!!!
Britt says I have to lick you Hello!
on April 11th, 2008 at 2:30 PM
When you see the horses, look at their penises and think of me.
on April 11th, 2008 at 3:19 PM
I order you to follow Shiny’s orders. Have a great time, sweets!
P.S. Thanks telling that joke – I had forgotten that one! I’m so telling that tonight. What could possible be more fun than imitating a midget with a speech impediment? Nothing.
on April 11th, 2008 at 6:22 PM
shiny – i think i love you. that is brilliant. and quite possible might be done.
turn – is it wrong that i enjoyed you licking me? twice! with fabby on the phone!! (p.s. i had told my cousin of your shoe collection. she was VERY impressed that you knew who designed her red fuck her pumps.)
avit – i always do.
gwen – the races were a blast. i drank too much. we are off to dinner and then the huge party that maker’s mark throws. don’t worry, we are taking a cab this time. we shall do our best to pick up a gaggle of italians for shiny’s you tube suggestion. (p.s. you REALLY need to get your ass down here next year. this is only the 2nd time we have done this adventure and there is NO way that we will miss it next year.)
on April 11th, 2008 at 6:40 PM
She tasted gooooood. Very goooood!!
hee hee
on April 11th, 2008 at 6:55 PM
That hat is actually on par with my Buffalo Sabres window licker’s hockey helmet that you were lucky enough to wear during the holidays when we visited the Burgh. Nice…very good…Should be hugely popular in the great state of Kentucky.
on April 11th, 2008 at 8:10 PM
You’re already having a blast! That’s wonderful! Drink one for me…
on April 12th, 2008 at 3:12 AM
tuen – feel free to lick me ANY time. i loved every second.
dvd – ummmm, this was MUCH more awesome than a sabres hat. the frikken owner of the comapnyh gave me a hat and autographed it. WAY cool.
liz – hey pretty lady. i will blame my serious intoxication on my drinking more than one for you. why? because i had you back and needed to drink bourbon for you. would you please consider throwing up for me? seriously! i drank a TON of booze tonight. damn shots with the little boys at the bar!
on April 12th, 2008 at 7:55 AM
WHAT???—you did shots AFTER I left at 12:30??? LOLOL That ride to Loretto is gonna be SOOOOOO fun hee hee
I’ve sorted where we are going to supper. Text me LOL
on April 12th, 2008 at 9:46 AM
turn – my fucken head is killin me. forgot to drink water yesterday. ouch.
um, yeah. a while after you left i was spanking some guy and then this other guy came over and bought shots and it went down hill. stories later tonight.
p.s. the guy buying the shots works at some restaurant and we agreed to eat there. not that we have to, but we can discuss it later. after i get a reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally long shower that will hopefully help me gather the strength to drive to loretto.
on April 12th, 2008 at 10:51 AM
LOLOL
grab some hair of the dog at the distillery and text me the restaurant!
on April 12th, 2008 at 12:30 PM
Hello, you need to grope Turn.. trust me.. it’s GOOD
on April 12th, 2008 at 8:40 PM
sounds like you’ve been having fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
on April 13th, 2008 at 8:09 PM
Nope…because anyone can get a horsey hat and I have the only window licker’s hockey helmet in captivity. You are WRONG.